Friday, January 07, 2005

The MSN-screwtape 'letters'

Christopher and Steven= C S... 'Lewis'?

These brothers in Christ of mine have never stopped 'harassing' me since the day I knew them.
'Harassing' too atrocious a word?


Wait til...

1) you get your sleep pattern disrupted because of Risk-their fantasy game of conquering the world.
Tehtarik-ing the scenario...
Pinky (Chris): Brain, what are we gonna do tonight?
Brain (Steven): Same thing we do every night, TRY TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!

If you are unfamiliar with the familiar tagline above, it is derived from the hysterically funny cartoon Pinky and the Brain-two discordant(!) lab mice, always on a mission to try to conquer the world.

2) you get your sleep pattern disrupted again because of the confusing and mind-boggling theological questions they asked you.

3) you get your sleep pattern disrupted...again (yes, again) because you spent the whole night debating and pondering over the yet again, confusing and mind-boggling theological questions they asked you.

4) THEY invade your blog site...

Now that's too much.

So, as a token of appreciation to these brothers of mine, I shalt now declare the publications of never-before-seen-by-public MSN conversations exchanged between them.

Synopsis: Christopher meddled with my MSN( and I suspect he not only meddled with my MSN but also with my blogspot...) and took my place to have a very interesting conversation with Steven, who is amazingly unaware of our swap of identities.

Characters: miss wormwood- Christopher/ Christie
Mr Left - Steven
Mr D - Steven's beloved roomate, his identity shalt be an
enigma for now.

Warning: The editor shalt not be labouring with the editing of this fine literature work to preserve its originality and *ahem* element of mischief in it.

miss wormwood says: hey stupid fellow
miss wormwood says: hey leng cai
miss wormwood says: are u coming tonight?
Mr.Left says: wow
Mr.Left says: di called me lengchai, and yennie called me stupid fellow???
Mr.Left says: !!!!
miss wormwood says: are u there?
Mr.Left says: i m here
miss wormwood says: heard u r single
Mr.Left says: errr...i m.
miss wormwood says: ask questions ar?
Mr.Left says: okie kua
miss wormwood says: aiyar...nvm lar
miss wormwood says: you so leng cai
miss wormwood says: sure got a lot of bees swarming over u
Mr.Left says: *hmmm* Diana, don't play play. Yennie, CUT THE CRAP!!!
miss wormwood says: aikkk....
miss wormwood says: ok serious
miss wormwood says: wut u wanna talk abt?
Mr.Left says: who are U?
miss wormwood says: both
Mr.Left says: i cannot take two women at once...pls queue up
miss wormwood says: WOWWWW
miss wormwood says: so wut's ur current research?
miss wormwood says: errr...
Mr.Left says: "Antropological Study On Women With Weird Psycology: An Assessment of Female Local University Undergrads"
miss wormwood says: sounds interesting...give us the data, we'll run a regression with SPSS to determine if the variables are 1% significant or not
Mr.Left says: SHUCKSSS it's the evil e_nerv!!
miss wormwood says: hmmm....wrong deduction
Mr.Left says: who else wilt yield such terrible weapon as the SPSS? Thou taketh me a fool?
miss wormwood says: your eyes are coloured dear fren, u r not thinking objectively
miss wormwood says: btw, if u wanna reach here by 730, u better start preparing soon
Mr.Left says: Nay, I ayme watching a show righte now. Even my deare brethren Mr. D art attending to his owne business.
miss wormwood says: Procrastination is the thief of time
miss wormwood says: Being late is dishonouring God
miss wormwood says: come on leng cai, come lar
Mr.Left says: I succumb neither to thy pharisic preassure nor to thy wolf-call
miss wormwood says: so set urself to biblical standards of punctuality
miss wormwood says: or begin to shape malaysia towards a culture of precision and perfection
miss wormwood says: nothing pharisical though
Mr.Left says: Hark! Flee ye to a more worthy business than to disturb me!
miss wormwood says: no SERIOUS...pls come on time
Mr.Left says: I wilt attempt, but i am feeble and poor. My transport art provided by Mr. D
miss wormwood says: alright, please let him know...we're serious...i think a little bit of discipline in this area will do all of us good
Mr.Left says: ah! He is enjoying hymself too much.
Mr.Left says: i wilt try
miss wormwood says: guide him o sage like how u guide thy sheep
Mr.Left says: As I hath saide, I shalt attempt
Mr.Left says: I aym attempting now
miss wormwood says: press on bro....?
miss wormwood says: wut's emergent
Mr.Left says: Emergent?? hmm...this must be Di
miss wormwood says: ya ya
Mr.Left says: BTW, david is too engrossed!
miss wormwood says: hey, come over...we can talk abt emergent
Mr.Left says: errr...don't ye tempt me!
Mr.Left says: i m helpless...david is the fellow
Mr.Left says: go thee msg his phone
miss wormwood says: ok, doing dat right now
miss wormwood says: empowering CGC to discipline thy seniors
miss wormwood says: must set good precedence
Mr.Left says: alrite...then do it..
miss wormwood says: *disappointed*
Mr.Left says: how come?
Mr.Left says: he does not wanna come yet my fren
Mr.Left says: sabar...i m still persauding
miss wormwood says: okay
- The end....for now. -
I do hope there will be a sequel to this.:)

So, thank you, brothers for an opportunity this grand and for your benevolence in the partake of the contribution to bohtea with me.

"As iron sharpens iron, so a man sharpens the countenence of his friend."- Proverbs 27:17

For all the 'sharpening', confusion, rebukes, constant provocation of the mind, funny, funny ideas of theology that you implant in me, emergent talks, free rides, introduction to all the funny, funny guys like jonathan edwards (no wonder I'm still single) and ruin you brought to my Saturday nights reading their articles (lagi-la single!); I thank thee and thee.

It has been a marathon; but let's keep running!


Blogger discordant_dude said...

Freeze! You've been invaded!!! But dun worry, I'll spare you the publicity till approval is granted. Nice write-up :) Haha.

12:25 AM  
Blogger Jack The LOT{B}R said...

C S Lewis? Wow, too high an honour...for Christopher. And remember Sis, some guys are extremely attracted to women who read Jon. Edwards (peace and blessings be upon his name), there's yet hope for you.

*I disagree with "They invade your blog site...". As far as I know, I did not come here by force or by fraud.

Enjoyed reading this blog. Been tehtariking here for a while now...

Steven, or better known here as Mr.Left

2:52 AM  
Blogger tehtarik said...

Ok, so Steven came here upon 'invitation' (ini pasal tangan tehtarik gatal, bagi die alamat blogspot ni).

But Christopher....invasion! invasion!

9:56 AM  
Blogger The Hedonese said...

Er... oops, have I invaded a private tea-party? why am I here ar?

1:37 AM  
Blogger enn@j said...

firstly....muahahahaha. The nicest 'teh tarik' i've ever had! Such highly amusing conversation and yet intelligiently humorous :)

yennie...excellent writings. I enjoy 'invading' your blog..hehe.

-joanne or turn it over enn@j

1:41 PM  
Blogger jacksons said...

Hello from the Tsunami Jacksons. :)

11:35 AM  

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